You tried what you knew and what you knew failed you. You “knew” how a hierarchy works and wanted to talk to people you considered important (mayor, superintendent of schools, city manager, and sheriff). You wanted to go to lunch with these people, get inside their circle. But what did you want to talk to these people about? Did you want them to explain how local government works or explain their jobs to you? What did you want to know that was so important, that you “expected” busy people to stop working and talk to you?

You don’t mention any local issues at all, suggesting the town was running smoothly and people were satisfied with their leadership. Did you look at the condition of the town and people’s homes, and “assume” people should be upset or angry with their local officials and leaders? Did you blame local officials?

You say 80-90% of the people who lived there were black. Black people understand systems really well – do you? Can you tell the difference between elected official’s choices and a decision rendered by system force alone? Black people know the constraints the system places on their elected officials and leaders – do you? Because black people know these things, they don’t blame their leaders for things they have no control over – do you?

Look around you now. See all those white people at school boards and city council, etc. screaming and yelling over masks, CRT, books, etc.? Listen to them, they have no idea how the system works. They actually believe an “elected” official can do anything they want whenever they want. If that were true, those officials would be dictators, not representatives.

You were so convinced you “knew” what you were doing, you completely missed “The Story”. The story was the impact systems had on that town – the way systems kept those people from helping themselves and kept them down. The ways the land-use system kept them from planning their own town. The ways the education system kept them from providing a good education to their children. The ways the tax system dictated how their collective resources were spent. The ways the system enabled big corporations to exploit them and the land they live on. The way the healthcare system kept them from accessing good healthcare, dentists, eye care, hospitals, emergency rooms and psychological services. Etc. and so on and on and on.

The story was how that town’s local leaders and elected officials managed to function in systems that were fighting to keep them down - not serve them.

The people in that town, gave you their patience, tolerance and kindness – not racism. The minister was doing charitable work, taking care of you, you were a charity case, lost, in over your head. You were so ignorant you actually thought you “knew” what you were doing. You were so blind, you could not “see” anything around you. You were so deaf, you could not “hear” anyone but yourself.

You went there full of assumptions, based entirely on your white life, and felt out of place in a town filled with people who “knew” a whole lot more than you did. You are blaming other people for your failures and that is wrong. Worse yet, years and years later, you still have no idea that the problem was you.