Quite frankly, I honestly believe that black people would be best served, by remaining a strong voter block, unto themselves. I say this because, my experience has taught me, the dangers of co-opting.
Co-opt is so important I feel the need to define it. To co-opt is to:
- appoint to membership of a committee or other body by invitation of the existing members.
- divert to or use in a role different from the usual or original one.
- social scientists were co-opted to work with the development agencies
- adopt (an idea or policy) for one’s own use.
For example, an effort to be inclusive, all too often “invites” people into leadership positions that grant them un-earned power. For example, a city council member resigns before his term expires. To save the cost of a special election, the city council agrees to appoint a replacement. A whole lot of people show up to the next meeting in support of one person. The council agrees to appoint their candidate. Suddenly, the new council member is speaking on behalf of the council, making announcements to the press, giving orders to the city staff, stopping by to “check” on city projects, contacting the city attorney with questions, and offering himself as a speaker to local civic groups and clubs etc.
Efforts to reign in the un-elected council member is met with opposition from the same group of people who supported his appointment and they are extremely well-organized and loud. The public is soon convinced that the council is hiding something. At the next election, the appointed council member and one of his friends are elected. The once highly effective and competent city council is now at war with itself, the city staff is under attack and compromises put special interests before the public. In short, the city council had been co-opted.
For example, extremely competent advocates’ quickly gain wide spread attention. These competent advocates are so persuasive, such excellent speakers, so deeply informed, such powerful net-workers and so darned tenacious, opponents consider them serious threats. To minimize the damage, opponents offer these advocates highly paid and lofty titled positions. Suddenly, the once focused advocate is advocating token solutions, urging patience, championing compromise, and preaching understanding for the “other” side. In short, the advocate has been co-opted.
Look, I’m a woman too, but my life experience tells me, that my white skinned female life and my black girlfriends’ lives are best served by NOT joining forces. If woman my color are to ever know equality, I need my black girlfriends to remain super-glued to stuck on their issues. That said, there is something I can, I will and I do all the time.
Despite my need for privacy, 40 years of experience is worth its weight in gold. My strength is brainstorming — finding fresh approaches, unexpected help in strange places and kludging resources together that lead to serious, long-term solutions to huge problems. As I age, people come to me for brainstorming and I spend countless hours in conversation, discussing, dissecting, debating and researching ideas.
Brainstorming does not work, without ground rules and be open and be honest, are the most important rules of all. “Your comment really hurt my feelings” can be the key to unlocking a once hidden solution. “Excuse me, what do cookies have to do with this” can make a pile of money. “Do you have any idea how that sounds to me” can change the world.
We, white-skinned women, have way too much work to do on ourselves. If we try and lead people we know nothing about, we will never get our own work done. Uh oh, I heard someone ask what white women need to work on. Okay, I’ll take the question.
White women need to start talking. Remember: Silence is tacit approval. “Tacit” means understood or implied without being stating. And that means a room full of silent women, allows people to believe each and every one of those women, agrees with everything being said.
Every white woman who chooses silence, is giving her permission to every wrong she witnesses. Way too many wrongs, that white women witness, return to take their own children — including rape, addiction, poverty, depression, suicide and anxiety. I’m sorry, but white women’s silence is deafening.
The Bette Middlers of this country, are NOT the silent one’s and I think these women need to examine that fact, very, very carefully. Perhaps Middler could use some brainstorming sessions. For example, Middler could read some Medium essays and provide thoughtful comments on a regular basis. She could persuade other women in her field to do the same thing. That’s just one way, stars could “pass” the microphone and amplify the voices of women from all walks of life. At the very least, they could be creative.
Just to be clear here, the more diverse the women, the more powerful the brainstorm. But, brainstorming takes practice. Before people are ready for wild, often heated brainstorming, it is best to practice among friends.
