Mel, having been in similar situations myself, I suspect that the way Jay spoke to you (his tone of voice, his choice of words, etc.) upset you more than you realized.

And so I ask, does Jay normally use that tone of voice when he speaks with you? Does Jay use words like f-ck and hate n everyday conversation? Does Jay always dominate conversations? Does Jay usually fly off on long rants like that? If any of the answers are yes, I seriously doubt you would have developed any kind of relationship with him at all.

But you do have a relationship with Jay, which makes me think you are more worried about Jay, than offended by him. I think you have good reason to be worried, because what you are describing are symptoms of distress that often lead to dangerous levels of anxiety or depression.

And so, the real question is what happened to Jay?

I'm just guessing, but it sounds like Jay moved to Texas and found himself isolated and alone. Unwittingly, he replaced his old social support network in California, with right-wing media and got himself addicted.

Since liberal minded people cannot tolerate right wing media, they have trouble comprehending what happens to right-wing media addicts. Simply put, right wing media is a round the clock, 365 day a year fear machine.

For a few months in early 2016, I worked with people who listened to Talk Radio all day. Other than my job, nothing in my life had changed, my family and I were as happy as always. Nonetheless, I found myself struggling with severe anxiety, short-tempered, fighting off inexplicable bouts of rage, and going home so exhausted I could barely make dinner.

When I finally told my co-workers what I was feeling when the listened to talk radio, they started listening to music. Overnight, the entire work place changed. Everyone was calmer, less stressed, enjoying each other's company, kidding around and bonding (and we've remained friends ever since).

Try it for yourself Mel. For the next month, listen to TalkRadio or Fox news one hour a day and pay close attention to how you are feeling. If you accept this assignment, I bet you start feeling what I felt and what I suspect Jay is feeling.

It sounds like Jay has been overwhelmed by fear and powerlessness. If so, Jay needs reassurance and some help regaining a sense of security that comes from belonging to a social network, with real people in it.