I cannot lie. I admit it. I am a Karen. Put me in the vicinity of a Karen and out comes my Karen. Is Karen-ism contagious?

When I tried to cure myself with the self-examination thing, I found so many Karens in my experience, I decided to keep mine. I'm a Karen and that's all there is to it.

I think my Karen behaviour is unacceptable and often embarrassing, so it always surprises me when my Karen explodes, and people thank me, even applaud. Good grief, after one of my Karen episodes in a Home Depot, there were at least 30 people applauding - literally applauding. "That felt so good," said a young customer service woman to my daughter. "Not if you're her daughter" replied my daughter and they both started laughing. There was nothing funny about it - Karens are really ugly people and I like to keep mine tucked away.

Age brings Karens a whole new line of benefits. I've actually heard my Karen say, "Go ahead, hit an old woman you nasty witch." That particular Karen came charging at me, and I heard my Karen say, "come on, hit me, give me an excuse, please give me an excuse." Ever since that happened, the cashier the other Karen had attacked, greets me so enthusiastically, you'd think we were related. As I said, age brings Karen benefits.

I took that cute little "put on your big girl panties" cartoon hanging in my bathroom down, crossed out the big girl part - and now it reads, "put on your Karen panties".

The way I see it, if you're a Karen, make sure you're a good one.